Unfortunately, in society today, respect is earned, not given. This includes all aspects of our lives, from working with colleagues to personal relationships. In dating, the same holds true—you show men how you are to be treated. Some women let little things slide in the beginning stages of a relationship, and those issues end up snowballing later on down the road,and then it’s just too late! The things that you put up with in the beginning of a relationship will definitely come back to haunt you, years from now. Thus, it is your responsibility to know exactly what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship, and to teach your partner to act and treat you accordingly.
When it comes right down to it, men are like children and they have to be taught how to treat you. I will give you an example. When first getting to know someone, I cannot stand texting as the main mode of communication. I let this be known up front, that I prefer a phone call over text message, that is if you really want to get to know me. If my potential suitor sends me a text after I have let him know this is now what I want, I do not respond to the text, at all. I will wait for him to call me and I will tell him again that I do not like texting and that a phone call is preferable. If this person continues to text, then all communication is cut off. This is not a matter of being rude or too stern, but an issue of whether the person you are trying to build a relationship with respects the boundaries you have set forth. If they cannot accept a simple request to communicate via phone call instead of texting, then you can bet there are a number of other boundaries they will end up crossing as your relationship progresses. Remember you as a woman are a queen and should be treated as such.
All women need to realize the power they hold in a relationship. That thing between your legs is a treasure and 9 times out of 10 the man pursuing you will do just about anything to get it or continue getting it on a regular basis. Now I’m not saying that your buried treasure is the ONLY thing a man wants, but if they are pursuing you in any form or fashion… he wants it. As a woman it is your goal to find that delicate balance between being cool, but not cold, to speak sternly, but not to be argumentative. You want to make sure your man knows what a prize you are as a whole and what a privilege it is to be with you. Don’t settle for less, because you are to impatient to wait for the best. Keep your heels, standards and heads high!
Remember it’s nothing wrong with whipping him into shape!
Prostitution is known as the world’s oldest profession, and yet, the women who engage in the profession are demeaned and marginalized. Women who work in the sex industry, are often frowned upon and looked at as lower class because of their profession – whether it’s phone sex, exotic dancing, or porn stars. This, unfortunately, has a number of negative repercussions such as these women feeling unable to report an assault, missing out on employee benefits, and isolation from friends and family because they have to keep their profession a secret. Why do women who work in a profession that has been around for millennia have to hide it in secrecy or face harsh consequences? This question is especially troubling when we ponder the fact that men who patronize the services of these women are not demonized in the same way women are.
While women compose the largest group of those working in the sex industry, it is men who are the biggest consumers and patronize their services. Men will openly discuss going to a strip club to celebrate a bachelor party, a promotion at work, or even just to blow off some steam after a hard work week. They are rarely given disapproving looks and comments about engaging in this behavior. Many musical artists make strip club images a major part of their persona. The big spender who can “make it rain” at the strip club is seen as powerful and take charge type of person, while the women who work in these industries are called a number of impolite names. Why is this? Why do women who engage in the profession or even like patronizing the services of the sex industry deemed “impure” or “tainted” while the men are often bestowed with a level of respect?
One cannot deny there are a number of issues wrong with the sex industry as a whole. Unfortunately, there are some people who end up forced into it due to circumstances, and this is unacceptable. However, there are a number of women who willingly choose to work in this industry for a number of reasons, and those women are just as deserving of respect as anyone else. Regardless of your reason, I #support you! People are sexual beings, and we all deserve to have our decisions acknowledged and` respected.
Today, something like 60% of households are headed by women. This means a lot of women are raising children either on their own, or are the main breadwinners for their families. Long gone are the days when we assumed it was the men who went out and “earned the bacon” while women stayed home and took care of the children and household. However, if we really look at historical evidence, very few women lived in a situation in which they were able to stay home and raise their children.
The rise of the middle class in the 20th century, saw many women were able to stay home, raise their children and be housewives. However, women of lower socioeconomic status rarely enjoyed this benefit. These women—poor women and women of color—were often tasked with having to work a variety of jobs such as cleaning homes and caring for other peoples’ children in order to make ends meet. The working woman is nothing new, yet the opportunity for the types of jobs women have today is relatively new. Today women are rising the ranks in corporate offices, opening their own businesses at higher rates than our male counterparts, and still a strong majority of the “helper” professions, such as teaching, nursing, and social work. But are women getting the respect we deserve?
There are a number of studies that have come out, that show while women are working just a much, if not more, than men, when it comes to domestic responsibilities, they often fall on our shoulders. We are still expected to be the primary caretakers of the children, cook, clean, and take care of the number of other responsibilities that come along with running a home. Is this fair? To many, it seems as if this is not fair to women. Our grandparents’ way of life is no longer an option for many of us. Many homes have to have two incomes in order to comfortably survive. If women are expected to work to help support our families and shoulder all the domestic responsibility, it stands to reason we are not receiving the respect we deserve.
Women have fought hard to have equal access to education and employment opportunities. The fight continues even today, especially when you look at inequities in pay and fields such as science and technology. For generations, we have been expected to take care of domestic chores, while the men brought home the bacon. Things are different today and in a world where women make up nearly 50% of the employment rate, it is time we get the respect we deserve, both in the workforce and at home.
“You hit like a girl” or “you throw like a girl” are phrases used in today’s society meant to imply we as women are not as strong or as competitive as our male counterparts. This is simply not true. Women hold up our families, our communities, and the world. Do not be afraid to embrace being a woman and your womanhood. Unfortunately, those phrases we learned as children, often guide us through situations in our adulthoods. While at work we are often afraid to seem to “girly” or show certain emotions out of fear of being called petty or some other name that is meant to be demeaning to our gender. While we may have to bite our tongue and hold back at work, it is not necessary to do so on our free time. When we come home, and our uniforms and stuffy work apparel comes off, it is our time to embrace who we are. If you want to dress up in the highest heels you can find and put on the shortest dress to match, do so. More comfortable running around the house completely naked or in a pair of sweats -just do it. If you want to let your hair down, take a pole dancing class, put on some sexy lingerie to feel that silk or satin against your skin do it or learn about the latest great tasting beer, do so. Being a woman does not limit your opportunity to explore what it is you like and enjoy. Embrace your womanhood and embrace your life, you only have one.
While you are embracing your life, do not forget to take care of your mental and physical health. Do not overextend yourself taking care of others, if you do not have to. We all have responsibilities and obligations to the people we love, but we also have a duty to take care of ourselves. If you are not feeling well, take the day off, get some rest, call a friend or family member and ask them to take care of the kids for a few hours while you take a nap, get a massage or do whatever makes you happy. Seek counseling if you feel you have some emotional or mental health issues you need to work through. Do not skip regular check-ups with your family practitioner or gynecologists. Eat food that makes you feel good and move your body. Get tested regularly for diseases that affect us such as HIV or breast cancer. Taking care of yourself ensures you will be able to be a better employee, friend, daughter, mother, lover, woman and so much more.