So I made the decision to give this UStream thing a try. I’ve heard so many great reviews about it. Now keep in mind this is my very first broadcast. Yes, I said it so bear with me here. I think it went rather well. I talked about pleasing yourself.
There’s nothing like the joys of touching and pleasing yourself. So check it out and tell me what you think.
I also shared my personal secrets for when it comes to pleasing myself.
Stay tuned more juicy topics to come soon!
Today, something like 60% of households are headed by women. This means a lot of women are raising children either on their own, or are the main breadwinners for their families. Long gone are the days when we assumed it was the men who went out and “earned the bacon” while women stayed home and took care of the children and household. However, if we really look at historical evidence, very few women lived in a situation in which they were able to stay home and raise their children.
The rise of the middle class in the 20th century, saw many women were able to stay home, raise their children and be housewives. However, women of lower socioeconomic status rarely enjoyed this benefit. These women—poor women and women of color—were often tasked with having to work a variety of jobs such as cleaning homes and caring for other peoples’ children in order to make ends meet. The working woman is nothing new, yet the opportunity for the types of jobs women have today is relatively new. Today women are rising the ranks in corporate offices, opening their own businesses at higher rates than our male counterparts, and still a strong majority of the “helper” professions, such as teaching, nursing, and social work. But are women getting the respect we deserve?
There are a number of studies that have come out, that show while women are working just a much, if not more, than men, when it comes to domestic responsibilities, they often fall on our shoulders. We are still expected to be the primary caretakers of the children, cook, clean, and take care of the number of other responsibilities that come along with running a home. Is this fair? To many, it seems as if this is not fair to women. Our grandparents’ way of life is no longer an option for many of us. Many homes have to have two incomes in order to comfortably survive. If women are expected to work to help support our families and shoulder all the domestic responsibility, it stands to reason we are not receiving the respect we deserve.
Women have fought hard to have equal access to education and employment opportunities. The fight continues even today, especially when you look at inequities in pay and fields such as science and technology. For generations, we have been expected to take care of domestic chores, while the men brought home the bacon. Things are different today and in a world where women make up nearly 50% of the employment rate, it is time we get the respect we deserve, both in the workforce and at home.
“You hit like a girl” or “you throw like a girl” are phrases used in today’s society meant to imply we as women are not as strong or as competitive as our male counterparts. This is simply not true. Women hold up our families, our communities, and the world. Do not be afraid to embrace being a woman and your womanhood. Unfortunately, those phrases we learned as children, often guide us through situations in our adulthoods. While at work we are often afraid to seem to “girly” or show certain emotions out of fear of being called petty or some other name that is meant to be demeaning to our gender. While we may have to bite our tongue and hold back at work, it is not necessary to do so on our free time. When we come home, and our uniforms and stuffy work apparel comes off, it is our time to embrace who we are. If you want to dress up in the highest heels you can find and put on the shortest dress to match, do so. More comfortable running around the house completely naked or in a pair of sweats -just do it. If you want to let your hair down, take a pole dancing class, put on some sexy lingerie to feel that silk or satin against your skin do it or learn about the latest great tasting beer, do so. Being a woman does not limit your opportunity to explore what it is you like and enjoy. Embrace your womanhood and embrace your life, you only have one.
While you are embracing your life, do not forget to take care of your mental and physical health. Do not overextend yourself taking care of others, if you do not have to. We all have responsibilities and obligations to the people we love, but we also have a duty to take care of ourselves. If you are not feeling well, take the day off, get some rest, call a friend or family member and ask them to take care of the kids for a few hours while you take a nap, get a massage or do whatever makes you happy. Seek counseling if you feel you have some emotional or mental health issues you need to work through. Do not skip regular check-ups with your family practitioner or gynecologists. Eat food that makes you feel good and move your body. Get tested regularly for diseases that affect us such as HIV or breast cancer. Taking care of yourself ensures you will be able to be a better employee, friend, daughter, mother, lover, woman and so much more.
Each day, millions, if not billions, of women around the world get up and work hard to support themselves and their families. These women work hard to reach their goals in life. Women working in male dominated fields (police officer, construction, firefighter, accounting/finance, comedy,and tech – just to name a few), face the added bonus of sexism, skepticism about their ability solely because of their gender, and in extreme cases, sexual harassment. These women often make sacrifices their male counterparts do not have to make. Societal expectations demand that women work, but also seek a partner and marriage, and maintain the majority of the responsibility for household work, which includes raising the children. This is a heavy burden for anyone. Do you believe this is something you are willing and able to do?
Now by no means am I saying that it’s not possible or even rewarding. If you truly have a passion for what you are doing, then you can overcome a lot to succeed in your career. However, it is important to note, that you may have to make sacrifices. You will have to ask yourself how much are you willing to sacrifice? Are you willing to put off marriage and children? And if so, for how long? Are you able to give up nights and weekends to make yourself part of the “good ole boys club”? These are questions you will eventually have to contend with, and the answer will be different for everyone.
The fact of the matter is, you will definitely have to work twice as hard as your colleagues to prove yourself. When entering a male dominated field, they will definitely try to break you down and treat you as if you don’t belong. The advice I can offer is to have a thick skin, as hard as it may seem, you cannot have an emotional breakdown in the work place or you will be seen as easy prey. Men get to play the good ole boys card and we get criticized for batting our eyelashes or just simply being a good looking woman in a male dominated field.
When we have actually worked hard and achieved the necessary things to put us at the top of our game, or give us longevity in our field we hardly ever get the credit for achieving things on our own merit. This is the reality of the situation.
In short, working in a male dominated field, as a woman, presents a number of challenges. We are seen as the weaker sex, and will be made to prove ourselves over and over again. While men are more readily accepted into the good ole boys club, women are often chastised for playing the sexy girls card. Well, I say play it up! Whatever advantages you have as a woman, use them. You will still be a competent professional, just one who plays by their own rules and gets ahead.